Donate

Keep the River Running. Keep the Liquor Flowing.

Look, we're not out here saving whales or planting trees. We're pushing barges, drinking cheap whiskey, and trying to keep the lights on for the people who matter — the local liquor stores that fuel the mission and the Baby Mamas who somehow still answer the phone when we call from a sandbar at 2am.

Is it a noble cause? Debatable. Is it our cause? Absolutely.

We won't spend it on anything responsible, we promise.

Your dollars go toward keeping the crew fed, the gear running, and the merch flowing. Think of it as a tip jar for people who work harder and drink harder than anyone you know.

We're not a 501c3. We're barely a functioning crew.

Toss in a few bucks. No judgment on the amount — every dollar keeps us one step further from having to get real jobs.

Hit the button below and send whatever you got. CashApp makes it easy.

This is not a charity. This is not tax-deductible. This is not a good financial decision on your part.

But it is the right thing to do.

Donate. Drink. Repeat. The river don't run on good intentions.

— The Asshole Crew